Dedication: De and Mo. They couldn't stop me from writing it.

*in a voice as sweet as honey* In the beginning there was the Moypire. And it was bad. There was also Deja Vu's Rebellion. And it was good.The Moypire was bad because their leader, Moyima, was really a bald man. The Deja Vu Rebellion was good because their leader, Deja Vu, was really Jar Jar Binks. Moyima also had a beer gut and smelled of fish, which attracted Jar Jar to him in a completely non-sexual way. No, Jar Jar wanted to eat Moyima. But he didn't. Both Jar Jar and Moyima were vying for one young woman's affections and attentions. Any guesses as to who?
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It was Princess Kitt of the planet Echnagtronia. They would often spy on her while she played hopscotch, skipped stones, ordered about slave Hutts, etc.
Finally, the day came that the empress of the universe, Sarah, who was from the same planet as the Princess Kitt, decided to put a stop to Deja Vu and Moyima's perverse and disturbing ways. She turned Moyima into a human female and did the same for Deja Vu but she forgot to change the gender of one thing: clothing. They took one look at each other, widened their eyes, covered their eyes, screamed, and ran in the opposite direction of the other.

Moyima tripped over a pile of petite armoured clothing which she quickly put on. The breast plate covered her chest area but not the stomach - cloth covered that. On one hip was a half skirt. The leggings went all the way to her toes and the boots went all the way to her knees. For her arms, she wore gauntlets. Moyima was most pleased with her new appearance.

Deja Vu tripped over petite armoured clothing as well only her armour covered much more than Moyima's. She had no skirt but did not need nor desire one. Her arms, stomach, and legs were more than protected by the armour. Deja Vu was very much pleased with her new appearance as well.

Moyima later went on to discover that her son, Anakin Skywalker (for she was his father), had become Darth Vader, father to Leia and Luke. Appalled that she was the grandmother of a Jedi, Moyima did not make her presence known to her descendents; choosing instead to become feared in five star systems; very deeply disliked in ten.

Deja Vu, on the other hand, quickly became friends with Luke Skywalker. When he had found out who his father was on that fateful day at Bespin, she was the one he told. When he had managed to save his father after the final battle against Palpatine, she kept his secret. Thusly, it was all thanks to Deja Vu that father and son could begin building their relationship in peace. However, the day soon came that Deja Vu had to leave to track down Moyima and put a stop to her Moypireness. So Deja Vu and her rebellion flew away to a distant star system where the Moypire had last been spotted.

Luke and the man once known as Vader once known as Anakin began discussing the prospects of starting a new and better Jedi order. One that would allow red lightsabers because that had been the reason Anakin had turned to the dark side in the first place. It hadn't been for power or for revenge, rather, it had been for the fact that the dark side offered lightsabers in the color red. The father/son relationship between the two continued to grow to enormous heights.

The battle between the Moypire and Deja Vu's Rebellion never ended. Both died old, decrepit, and senile - their chosen heirs quickly took on the fight.

The End
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